Dear Chitchat Rumor,

It is true that when I was young, I lived with my aunt and cousins and was constantly treated badly.  I was isolated from the other children because I was apparently to unusual of a girl.  Sometimes when I was bad, my aunt would lock me in the "red room" where I would scream and cry until I was let out.  The red room was an extremely scary place for a young girl to be locked away in.  I often imagined ghosts and spirits taunting and attacking me while I was in that room.  

It has been difficult for me to develop an interpersonal relationship with anybody based on the fact that I have never felt like I truly had my own place in a family.  My real family was kept a secret from me and when I was finally told about them, a sense of relief washed over me because I knew that I was not as different as everyone thought I was.  

When I moved into Mr. Rochester's house I was hired as his nanny or governess.  I was to teach his young daughter arts, language, science and math.  Though she was quite the strong spirited little girl, she enjoyed my company for she was also isolated in her own home considering her father was constantly away or just hiding out somewhere in the house.  

I remember when I first met Rochester I found him to be extremely cold and it was hard to have any sort of conversation with him.  After I came to his rescue by waking him up out of a deep sleep while the bed he slept in was on fire, he was extremely thankful for my bravery and became much more enjoyable to speak with and I started finding myself actually quite taken by Mr. Rochester.  I actually spent a lot of time drawing pictures of who Rochester would be attracted to and pictures of myself so I could compare the two.  I would find so many differences between the two women, I would end up trying to talk myself out of feeling anything emotional for him because I knew Rochester could never fall in love with a young woman like myself.  

I do not think that I fell in love with Rochester based on the home he provided me considering I believe I worked very hard for my place in the house.  I fell in love with Rochester because I was able to have intelligent conversations with him.  I felt as if he completed my thoughts and I completed his.  Though he is much older than I am and much more worldly of a person, I feel as if he is my true other half and I his.